5 Attributes of a Leader: Part I
Implications
Anyone that knows me knows that I harp on leadership and what it looks like to be a real leader. Leaders run towards the danger. This is why, if a leader is effective, we don’t mind them making more money because they travel in the direction of danger on our behalf so that we don’t have to. I have a few attributes that I live by and believe about leaders.
Leading implies you’re taking someone to a new place.
Leading implies someone is voluntarily following.
Leaders serve first and eat last.
Leadership is serving those you lead from underneath.
Leaders sacrifice knowing it’s a thankless job.
1. Leading implies you’re taking someone to a new place.
There seems to be a debate about who is the basketball G.O.A.T. This debate is whether it is Lebron James or Michael Jordan. Here is an indicator of who should get that crown. When Lebron was in Miami, he managed to get Chris Bosh and Dwyane Wade to join him. They were already all-stars. They were great in their own right. When Lebron was at the Lakers, he managed to get Anthony Davis and Russell Westbrook to join him. They were already all-stars and great in their own right.
Conversely, when Jordan got to the Bulls, no one knew who John Paxton was nor who Bill Cartwright was. They were virtually unknown. No one knew who Steve Kerr was either. To this day, Jordan’s teammates will say two solid things about Jordan: 1) Jordan wasn’t interested in making friends on the team and 2) Jordan made everyone on the team better. Kerr specifically said that he was a better player because of Jordan. Are the people in your life better because they have encountered you?
The idea of leadership takes on this implication that you are all going somewhere. A leader takes a person or a group of persons from one place to another place. If you are not going somewhere, you are not leading, you are managing. Here’s what I mean by that.
If you’re married, as you go through your marriage, you are naturally moving from place to place. I don’t mean physically. I mean through stages in your life. Your children are small. Then they aren’t so small. He gets a new job. She gets a new job. This is movement. But here’s the catch: movement implies life. If I’m alive, I’m moving. If I’m not alive, I’m not moving. There’s a correlation. So in a healthy marriage where you are leading your family, the family is ebbing and flowing through life. New house. New school. Kids are getting older. New set of friends from time to time (usually based on external factors). This is often how you know where your leadership resides.
If you are not leading, it looks like this. You don’t have any movement of any kind. Even though the kids are getting older, you don’t feel any different. This leads you to feeling stagnant. Still. Immovable. You feel lethargic about your relationship with both your wife and your children. You don’t see anything progressing. This is how you know your leadership is all but dead. The worst part is you are usually blaming someone else. Someone else “let herself go.” Someone else doesn’t care. Someone never listens. I’m glad you mentioned listening.
2. Leading implies someone is voluntarily following.
The easiest way to make sure you have no followers is to stop listening. This is precisely what Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin, and Mao Zedong did. The numbers are staggering and are still debated for their accuracy, but most scholars tend to say that Joseph Stalin was responsible for approximately 9 million deaths during his reign as dictator. These same scholars say that Adolf Hitler was responsible for approximately 12 million deaths while he was “führer” of Germany. And lastly, not to be outdone by those two fine fellas, Mao Zedong was estimated to have been directly responsible for 40 million deaths during the “Great Leap Forward.” Definitely not a good name for that movement. Should’ve been called “the mid-leap 6 feet under.”
How did they accomplish all that? They did not listen. Yet they pretended to. Once they realized those under their care (really, control), weren’t listening, they forced their hand upon them. At this moment, they were no longer leading (not that they ever were), they were dictating. No one was following. They were merely marching in accordance with their instructions by use of force.
I’m not suggesting that we are anything like any of those guys. But I am suggesting that sometimes men set out to control their wives for fear they will lose them. The problem there is if they do stay, it is out of some obligation, duty, embarrassment, or fear. None of which lead to a healthy marriage and none are characteristic of a leader. Listen to those you lead. Hear what they are saying. Those you lead don’t care about your facts until you listen to their feelings.
The other three leadership points are discussed in the next post, Part II. We discuss eating last, serving from underneath, and sacrifical leadership.
Stay Classy GP!
Grainger